Episode 5: Apple removes his brain. Aka, Apple 'zi4 qu3 nao3 dai4'

Setting: A deserted orchard, named 'PQ is better? FW is the worst?' planted by Apple himself. The sky was a sinister mass of dark clouds. Thunder rolled and lightning flashed across the sky. Apple ran towards his fruit knife and caused the explosions to form. Next, he lifted the fruit knife and... (rest censored, too gory).

Apple: *slash* aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

Simultaneously, the apple trees around him exploded into flames, signifying that Apple had successfully removed his brain.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The removal of Apple's brain caused his vocabulary list to lose its ability to contain sensible and tasteful words and rendered him unable to learn any of these words too. Apple also lost his ability to give constructive criticism in forums, and only meaningless and crude words were left circulating in his system.

Consequently, all traces of sanity were erased from the brainless Apple. Apple no longer knew whether he was a HE or an IT. It became more and more confused about its own identity, and often dressed itself as an orange, or banana, or atom, or a Lucy Lu (whatever that was) instead.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(next scene)

s4phirEz: so Raynor kor, when are you going to the salon to straight-perm that horrible maggie mee hair of yours?

Raynor: (thinks for a moment) No I’m not.

s4phirEz: what do you mean no??! You mean I have to undergo the agony of seeing that hair for the rest of my life?

Raynor: hey, I need it to make myself look xiao1 sa3, ok!

s4phirEz: Fine. (runs away)

(a few mins after the brain-removal, Apple lost all human resemblance and looked totally like an innocent, brainless fruit)

After quarrelling with his shi1 mei4 (as usual), Raynor continued on his own, and came across this 'PQ is better? FW is the worst?' orchard and decided to visit it because of its provocative title, preparing to pui at any insults to his beloved Fann.

But all Raynor saw inside, was an innocuous looking little Apple...

Raynor: *slurp* This Apple looks sweet and delicious. Since there is no one around, I'll just eat it up. (note: Raynor is an upright man but sometimes he does not care for jiang1 hu2 gui1 ju3 that are too restrictive/prim and proper.)

~Apple felt extremely angry that Raynor actually mistook it for a fruit, and even wanted to eat it!! grrrr.. but there was nothing it could do! It comforted itself by thinking: 'at least I am a fruit, what is 'K'? He is just an alphabet!'

Raynor: (bites on a leaf, MJT-style) hey little Apple, let me just take a bite off you!

eh-heh-heh!

~Don't forget that after removing its brain, Apple's gong1 li4 had increased ten-fold. With supernatural strength, It brought down the fruit knife at Raynor's head...

(to be continued)

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