>>FINALLY A CHAIN LETTER THAT I LIKE!
>>Hello, my name is Basmati Kasaar. I am suffering from rare and
>>deadly diseases, poor scores on final exams, extreme virginity,
>>fear of being kidnapped and executed by anal electrocution, and
>>guilt for not forwarding out 50 billion fucking chain letters sent
>>to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, then
>>that poor fucking 6 year old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her
>>forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed
>>before her redneck parents sell her off to the traveling freak
>>show.
>>
>>Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you and
>>everyone you send his email to $1000? How stupid are you? Ooooh,
>>looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get
>>laid by every Playboy Bunny in the magazine! Wh! at a bunch of
>>fucking bullshit.
>>
>>So basically, this message is a big FUCK YOU to all the people out
>>there who have nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain
>>mail forwards. Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come
>>into my apartment and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing
>>the chain which was started by Ceaser in 5 A.D. and was brought to
>>this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it
>>to the year 2000, it'll be in the Guinness Book of World Records
>>for longest continuous streak of blatant stupidity.
>>
>>Fuck them!
>>
>>If you're going to forward something, at least send me something
>>mildly fucking amusing. I've seen all the 'send this to 50 of your
>>closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being
>>will somehow receive a Nickel from some omniscient being forwards
>>about 90 times. I don't fucking care. Show a little intelligence
>>and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out
>>forwar ! ds. Chances are it's your own unpopularity.
>>
>>
>>THE FOUR BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:
>>
>> Chain Letter Type 1:
>>(scroll down)
>>
>>
>>Make a wish!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>Keep Scrolling
>>
>>
>>
>>No, really, go on and make one!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>Oh please, they'll never go out with you!!!
>>Wish something else!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>Not that, you pervert!!
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>STOP!!!!
>>
>>
>>Wasn't that fun? :)
>>Hope you made a great wish :)
>>
>>
>>Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of all, if
>>you don't send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you will
>>be raped by a mad goat and thrown off a high building into a pile
>>of manure.
>>
>>It's true! Because, THIS letter isn't like those fake ones, THIS
>>one is TRUE!! Really!!! Here's how it goes:
>>
>>*Send this to 1 person: One person will be pissed off at you f or
>>sending them a stupid chain letter.
>>
>>*Send this to 2-5 people: ! 2-5 people will be pissed off at you
>>for sending them a stupid chain letter.
>>
>>*Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed off at you
>>for sending them a stupid chain letter, and may form a plot on your
>>life.
>>
>>*Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed off at you
>>for sending them a stupid chain letter and will napalm your house.
>>Thanks!!!! Good Luck!!!
>>
>> Chain Letter Type 2
>>
>>Hello, and thank you for reading this letter.... You see, there is
>>a starving little boy in Baklaliviatatlaglooshen who has no arms,
>>no legs, no parents, and no goats. This little boy's life could be
>>saved, because for every time you pass this on, a dollar will be
>>donated to the Little Starving Legless Armless Goatless Boy from
>>Baklaliviatatlaglooshen Fund.
>>
>>Oh, and remember, we have absolutel y no way of counting the emails
>>sent and this is all a complete load of bull! shit. So go on, reach
>>out. Send this to 5 people in the next 47 second s.
>>
>>Oh, and a reminder - if you accidentally send this to 4 or 6
>>people, you will die instantly.
>>
>>Thanks again!!
>>
>>
>> Chain Letter Type 3
>>
>>Hi there!! This chain letter has been in existence since 1897. This
>>is absolutely incredible because there was no email then and
>>probably not as many sad pricks with nothing better to do.
>>
>>So this is how it works... Pass this on to 15,067 people in the
>>next 7 minutes or something horrible will happen to you like:
>>
>>*Bizarre Horror Story #1
>>Miranda Pinsley was walking home from school on Saturday. She had
>>recently received this letter and ignored it. She then tripped in a
>>crack in the sidewalk, fell into the sewer, was gushed down a
>>drainpipe in a flood of poopie, an d went flying out over a
>>waterfall. Not only did she smell nasty, she died. This Could
>>Happen To You!!!
>>
>>*Bizarre Horror Story #2
>>Dexter Bip! , a 13 year old boy, got a chain letter in his mail and
>>ignored it. Later that day, he was hit by a car and so was his
>>boyfriend (hey, some people swing that way). They both died and
>>went to hell and were cursed to eat adorable kittens every day for
>>eternity.
>>
>>This Could Happen To You Too!!! Remember, you could end up just
>>like Pinsley and Bip. Just send this letter to all of your loser
>>friends, and everything will be okay.
>>
>>
>> Chain Letter Type 4
>>
>>As if you care, here is a poem that I wrote.
>>Send it to all your friends.
>>
>>FRIENDS:
>>
>>A friend is someone who is always at your side.
>>
>>A friend is someone who likes you even though you stink of shit,
>>and your breath smells like you've been eating catfood.
>>
>>A friend is someone who likes you even though you're as ugly as a
>>hat full of assholes.
>>
>>A friend is someone who cleans up for you after! you've soiled
>>yourself.
>>
>>A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry
>>about your sad, sad life.
>>
>>A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really
>>think you should be raped by mad goats, then thrown to vicious
>>dogs.
>>
>>A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet, vacuums and then gets
>>the check and leaves and doesn't speak much English...no, sorry
>>that's the cleaning lady.
>>
>>A friend is NOT someone who sends you chain letters because he
>>wants his wish of being rich to come true.
>>
>>Now pass this on! If you don't, you'll never have sex ever again!
>>
>>---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>>
>>The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to
>>leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete
>>it. If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off by making them
>>feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth, who's been
>>tied to a dead elephant for 27 years, whose only savior is the 5
>>cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this mail, otherwise
>>you'll end up like Miranda. Right?
>>
>>
>>--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>>
>>--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>>Hahaha..this is rather cool....Heh.